of Jonathan Livingston Seagull and the call within

i've been reading the tale of Jonathan Livingston Seagull - a fable about the aspirations of a seagull who longed to live a life less ordinary than that of the typical seagull.

part of me identifies with the hero of this story with his call to keep on learning how to fly.

i hear a relentless voice within which does not leave me alone, but keeps on calling me, even when i am stoned numb by the rut of routine, or caught up in the madness that sometimes characterises life, or lost amidst conflicting values and ideals. i want to put it off, i m not ready, i timidly cry.

part of me wants to keep going on this path - it's easier than i think, and a whole lot more comfortable than risking it all on something which may not come to pass. after all, it's not that difficult and after awhile, i'll learn to ignore the inequities and the unreasonableness, shoulders shrugged while i accept the unacceptable and keep plodding on.

and yet, i see that there is a better way out. somehow. someway. it's all going to make sense someday.